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Guide to Marriage Counseling and Its Benefits If couples look differently at issues and try to reconcile by themselves, it would really be a difficult task to do. And there are times when they don’t even agree with the issues, much less how to resolve it. Willingness on the part of each partner to put effort to resolve their marriage problems will make it easier for a marriage counselor to help them mend their marriage. The skills of the counselor is also a factor that contributes to the success of the marriage counseling. Couples can choose a counselor based on the credentials and recommendations from prior clients. Sometimes however, when choosing a counselor, personal chemistry is often a lot better. The question to ask is who you work well with. When both partners are comfortable then counseling can work well. The diplomas or accolades on the wall do not matter if either spouse cannot work well with the counselor. The sessions will not likely be successful ones. Finding a counselor that can work within the couple’s personal, cultural, and religious beliefs is the best for them. In many cases, a good counselor acts as the mediator between two conflicting parties. His job is to assure both parties that they will get their say. The counselor sees to it that they have productive and civil sessions. Advice is given by the counselor and also exercise to help the couple work through and resolve their problem.
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Many marriage counseling work well because each partner is given a chance to vent in a safe environment. The couple can voice out their concerns, fears, and sore points and they won’t receive censure or judgment. A trained counselor can make the couple go into their deeper, underlying feelings by pushing them past their obvious complaints.
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Going to a therapy with the wrong notion that the counselor will be the one to fix them will just lead to passive conversations. They don’t understand that the counselor is merely a guide, so each partner must invest himself/herself wholeheartedly into the session of there is realistic hope for success. Sometimes marriage counseling is seen as the last ditch effort before the couple decides to divorce. And there are instances when one spouse has already decided to file for divorce even before entering the counselor’s office. This mindset is counterproductive to therapy sessions. If a spouse is not committed to the process, he/she will resist any suggestion or advice the counselor gives. They may resent their presence in the session. They can also pretend interest and commitment while in the counselors’ office but become uncooperative at home. Both partners should have the commitment to the process and marriage healing if they want for counseling to succeed. Saving a marriage take a lot of hard work.